What would your reaction be if you found this scrawled on your family desk?
Admittedly, mine wasn't stellar. (Stellar may be the wrong word choice. It was impressive both in decibel level and intensity, but that isn't what I've been working on for the past five months now, is it?) I won't incriminate the guilty party, but let it be known that Mom's displeasure rang from the rafters.
May has been a month of extremes--joy and sadness, achievement and disappointment. Tucker returning from his mission was one of the happiest days of my life. Along with his return comes the challenge of learning to parent an adult living at home (temporarily--he's headed back to Provo in the fall). School is out for the year, and some grades and experiences were better than expected, while some were much worse.
I wish I could say I weathered it all with dignity and skill, demonstrating to all around me the self-mastery skills I have been working on this year, but that would not be the truth. My reactions have not always been tempered by reason, my tasks have not always been guided by purpose, my days have not always been filled with service. If I were completely honest, I would have to admit that my goal to act was far removed from my conscious mind most days during the month of May. I felt like my head was barely above water most days, and then on a few other days, my head was buried so deep in the clouds of happiness that I lost focus on reality and my job as the mom around here.
I don't know about you, but the end of the school year is almost as big of "a leaf turning over" as New Year's Day for me. I have high hopes for this summer. Big dreams of what I hope to teach my kids. Big. BIG.
Here's to a "new" summer resolution to act--with purpose, with control, with an eye for serving others. I'm not giving up.
And if any of you are interested in signing up for the Healthy Lifestyle Challenge I've issued, you can check out the rules/requirements here. We'd love to have anyone and everyone join us!
Admittedly, mine wasn't stellar. (Stellar may be the wrong word choice. It was impressive both in decibel level and intensity, but that isn't what I've been working on for the past five months now, is it?) I won't incriminate the guilty party, but let it be known that Mom's displeasure rang from the rafters.
May has been a month of extremes--joy and sadness, achievement and disappointment. Tucker returning from his mission was one of the happiest days of my life. Along with his return comes the challenge of learning to parent an adult living at home (temporarily--he's headed back to Provo in the fall). School is out for the year, and some grades and experiences were better than expected, while some were much worse.
I wish I could say I weathered it all with dignity and skill, demonstrating to all around me the self-mastery skills I have been working on this year, but that would not be the truth. My reactions have not always been tempered by reason, my tasks have not always been guided by purpose, my days have not always been filled with service. If I were completely honest, I would have to admit that my goal to act was far removed from my conscious mind most days during the month of May. I felt like my head was barely above water most days, and then on a few other days, my head was buried so deep in the clouds of happiness that I lost focus on reality and my job as the mom around here.
I don't know about you, but the end of the school year is almost as big of "a leaf turning over" as New Year's Day for me. I have high hopes for this summer. Big dreams of what I hope to teach my kids. Big. BIG.
Here's to a "new" summer resolution to act--with purpose, with control, with an eye for serving others. I'm not giving up.
And if any of you are interested in signing up for the Healthy Lifestyle Challenge I've issued, you can check out the rules/requirements here. We'd love to have anyone and everyone join us!
thanks for sharing this heart-felt post. you're human. from what i've seen here, you're an awesome mom who i very much admire. i needed to read this today, since i had my own day of flaws just yesterday. and this morning after some scripture reading and prayer, i had to write a letter of apology to my hubby. again, thanks for this post because it lets me know i'm not alone in my errors. we're all trying to be the best we can. blessings to you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteOh Man! I'm going to have to say that I most definitely would not remain cool on that one. Said guilty party would be learning about furniture refinishing the hard way. I would introduce guilty party to Mr. Sandpaper and encourage a long and familiar relationship.
ReplyDeleteThere's no way to remain calm and collected all the time, life has a way of making sure of that.
I'm very interested in the "health challenge". I think I'll join in if it's not too late.
Looking back, parenting RMs was the hardest of all the years. Raising teenagers was a breeze compared to RMs. They were great, it wasn't that. But I felt lost as their Mom....i didn't know how to act, how to react, what was best for them, etc etc. No one prepares us for this either. I never really thought past the homecoming.
ReplyDeleteI almost told you that it's challenging (while at the same time wonderful) having a return missionary at home. I did it twice and it was a difficult transition each time. Yet good too. I came to the conclusion that plans are a good thing, and the quicker he can act on them, the better. Even if it means flying the coop (again) and leaving home. Hopefully for school and his own kind.
ReplyDeleteMay the summer bring good things to all of you. I have been engaging in my own healthy lifestyle and have lost 15 pounds in the past 3 months. It's so awesome!
Hubby wants to know if this challenge is for women only" :)
ReplyDeleteIt is a bit of an interesting challenge when the "big boys" return home, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteBut it's an awfully fun one to meet!
Hope your summer is full of ACTion.
=)
Today after banging heads with Brennan all day long, he almost got hit by a car. It was so close that as I was running out into the street I knew 100% he was going to get hit. I am sill shook up over it and it's been 4 hours. I gave him quite the verbal lashing out of complete terror. To the point that he was plugging his ears and screaming "stop!" Over and over again. Not my finest moment. And of course all of my neighbors on every side of my house were there for a front row show of it. Awesome:) and now 4 hours later I'm sitting here wondering why I was yelling at my 5 yr old and not the man in the red car who was going 40 down our street without any concern for the 6 kids playing on the sidewalks. I even waved and said thank you to him after I got finished with Brennan as if I was so grateful he had saved my son. Why didn't I yell at him? Why didn't I get in is face and give him a lecture about slowing down when children are around and getting out and apologizing for almost killing a small child, completely obvlivious until the very last minute when I was running at his car? Instead I wave and say thanks??? What's wrong with me? The only thing I can think is that I don't care about that man, but I care about Brennan, and when you care sometimes you care with gusto. And so for the next hour I talked to Brennan about how sorry I was, and how glad I was that he was eating dinner with us tonight, and how hew needs to look two times before crossing, and how some grown ups don't look for kids and you don't regenerate outside of your game and really profound stuff like that. I think I just wrote a blog post about that and didn't mean to, LOL. Your picture just reminded me about that today. And this is Emily btw, on my husbands computer so it might show up nder his googles about when I post:)
ReplyDelete