I spent some time alone in Provo two weeks ago. Valuable reflection time. Valuable me time.
I walked along the swollen Provo river, witnessing the powerful rushing water destroy anything that stood in its way.
In that raging river I saw my life for the last year. Despite my goals in January to balance my life and take time for things that really matter, I haven't done it. I've been still set on tornado speed, whizzing through life, doing some things but neglecting most important things. I realized that my priorities have been skewed--skewed towards achievement and checklists and steered away from important things like play time and teaching time and bonding time.
I have allowed that rushing water to push important tasks downriver where I wouldn't see them. I have surrendered control to that swollen river of busyness and work, while my children's needs have been washed away like unimportant debris. I neglected my physical health, my house, and my friends--things that really matter.
It's time to take control, time to tighten the floodgates and manage this rushing water. I see that I'm allotted only so many minutes during the day and if I'm not careful, those minutes disappear without anything of eternal worth taking place.
I made some promises to myself that day. I promise to be a present mom, one who actively listens and interacts, not a mom that just goes through the motions. I promise to play more and yell less. I promise to express the joy I feel as the mother of my family and caretaker of my home. I promise to purposefully teach and advise and love these little ones in my life, because if I don't, no one else will.
I love my life. I love my job. I love being home and I love being the mom. I just need to remind myself of my priorities.
Well, that alone time was well-spent.
ReplyDeleteIt seems to me that you are all the things that you hope to be - just not all the time. We all need reminders to bring us back to our true focus. I`m always grateful for the alone time or whatever it is that helps bring me back.
Some days it seems easier than others. I struggle with balance daily, as I'm certain most moms do. I will make this pledge along with you Jen.
ReplyDeleteDana
It's a juggling act, that's for sure. And it's okay to set down a few of the balls. Of course, choosing which ones is the hard part!
ReplyDeleteSounds like you've got it figured out pretty well, though.
=)
Oh, I needed to hear this on our first Monday, of the first full week of summer at home... of all those things, being fully present is what I need help with the most.
ReplyDeleteKeep us posted on how it goes and any tips you discover!
I think we all get set on autopilot at times, and then we have to rethink and recenter. For what it's worth, I think you do an amazing job.
ReplyDeleteI enjoy your blog and insight so much. I emailed each one of my kids your one thing to teach your children--work. Thanks for your posts. You are hitting em' out of the park!
ReplyDeleteI enjoy your blog and insight so much. I emailed each one of my kids your one thing to teach your children--work. Thanks for your posts. You are hitting em' out of the park!
ReplyDeleteTighten the floodgates and manage...i love this. It is so hard but awesome that God can use something like a rushing river to teach us so much.
ReplyDeletemaybe it's not supposed to be balanced right now?
ReplyDeleteOh how alike we must be- This really hit close to home! I love your commitment to do better- I need to do some soul searching this week and get back to what really matters. Thanks for sharing!
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